A Lovely Day in The Park.

Hey there...

I have exams ongoing, after which I get half-day to study for the next exam.The thing is, I don't tell this at 'home'. I roam around, enjoying the only freedom I'll be getting in this wretched place.
I went to the beach on Tuesday, about which you can read here : http://intotheethereal.blogspot.com/
Be warned, it's the Other Alcoholic Toddler who wrote that post , I.e.  my serious twin...
Now, I chose to go to a cyber cafe for a while, then I got bored of that and I went to a small bakery to quench my thirst. After that I decided to go to The Park.

I reached there around 4. I sat on an empty bench and just idled away. After a while, a couple of guys came and sat nearby, commenting on the girls around and disturbing my peace. I got up and chose a secluded part of the park.

This part of my life is called: Getting Mugged.

So there I was, enjoying my chips in solitude, when suddenly 20 young men and boys came and surrounded me. The gang leader sat down beside me and asked me which college I was from. I told him. All this while another guy snatched my bag and started perusing it to forage for any valuable items.Thank god I didn't bring my phone or Cowon s9 that day. Another guy reached into my front pocket and snatched my ID card, confirming to the gang leader that I was telling the truth.
They began asking me various things in Tamil, almost none of which I understood. Meanwhile the gang leader, the only bulky guy of the lot, tried to sneak his hand into my backpocket where I had kept my wallet. Well, I didn't let him. He punched me in the face. I gave no reaction whatsoever.

One of the guys said (what roughly translates in hindi as- ) "Mat maar yaar, bechara hai "(Don't hit him, he's a poor little innocent)

The gan(d)g leader replied that I wasn't giving him my wallet.
" Kapde wapde utardenge..."(We'll make him strip)

This went on for a while....the guy made repeated attempts to snatch my wallet, and I didn't lett him succeed. He punched me again, and again the cycle went on. Finally, when the other men brandished their canes, I decided not to fight back. After all, I was outnumbered 20 to 1. And anyway, I decided it was better to give up a 100 bucks than have your bones broken. Or maybe worse....

So I gave him the money myself, showing him that that was all my wallet contained. He set my hair back like a loving uncle to humiliate me further  and said, "You're looking cute, man." (Gee, thanks, that's what your mom said last night)

Then they all walked away. I remained sitting there, not a hint of fear in my heart throughout the incident but just feeling irritated. There were three other people there, just watching....doing nothing.

Then the gang leader came back.
"Hey, do you have money for the bus?"
I shook my head. How much , he asked?
I held up my hand. He misread the message(Talk to the hand) and gave me first five, then a whole twenty bucks. How kind of him.

Then he disappeared again.

At the end of it all, I can honestly tell you:









That was fun, can we do it again? :D



So that's one more thing to cross off my list of things to try before I die:

1. Pissing on LOC.
2. Threesome with Gorilla and Crocodile
3. Getting mugged
4. Studying
5. Suicide Suicide(didn't work the first time)
6. Sex change ( I hope it's reversible)

This is Alcoholic Toddler signing off.

PS: I have informed my friend who has formidable thug connections to help me go about my mericless vendetta.

A slip of the tongue, a slit of the throat.
Dead men tell no tales.
Your laughing finger....will never point again!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Omerta- Lamb Of God)

And finally: (S)laughter is the best medicine ( The Joker, Batman: The Dark Knight)

Amen.